And all through the room,
this student, still typing,
Feels mixed feelings of gloom.
Cap and gown hang aloft
in my closet with care
and the promise of change
is thick in the air.
My novels, each nestled
All snug in their places;
But tonight, their pages
Cannot fill empty spaces.
And I on my laptop,
its screen glowing dimly
Feel that the walls around me
are suddenly flimsy.
My heart, in my chest,
is making such a din
that I am of half a mind
to let insomnia win.
Off to the internet
I go like a flash,
click open a browser
google "Benedict Cumber. . .bash--"*
The face of that man,
with his cheekbones and grin
makes reality's intrusion
a little less grim.
But tonight, of all nights
It does not take away
the fact that my life
is going to change in a day.
I imagine him saying,
all velvety and slow,
"It's okay, my dear girl,
that you're not sure where to go.
"Finding direction
Can be quite a trick.
You're not alone
in this, so don't feel sick."
"But Benny," I say,
timidly, in my mind,
"I'm sad because
of the people I'm leaving behind.
"Of friends that I've made
through thick and through thin
My life, without them
seems so horribly dim.
"I'm sad because things
Will never be the same,
And I can never go back
the way that I came."
He smiles, reaches over
And ruffles my hair,
And says (quite calmly)
"No, I know. It's not fair.
"Change is like shedding
a layer of skin, but friends
and the like will still be around.
Endings are never simply the end."
"I know," I shoot back. "I just wish
that I had some more time,
to savor each moment, and
not run out of these rhymes."
not run out of these rhymes."
"At least you've got
your whole life up ahead.
You're pretty damn lucky,"
Mr. Cumberbatch says.
"You're correct," I say,
"And I know that, I do.
I just cannot look forward
Without feeling blue."
His eyes twinkle, then,
and he says, with that knack--
"Who says looking forward
never means looking back?
"You've had some good times,
So hold them quite close
They'll keep you from turning
unbearably morose."
I smile at that,
For I know that he's right,
And thank him, and bid him
an imaginary "Good night."
I turn off my laptop,
Feeling like I can cope,
because in spite of the sadness,
there is now, also-- hope.
Hope for all the things
I've always wanted to do--
see my friends, write a book
watch some more Doctor Who.
I wipe away a tear
and nestle down in my bed
A million new goals
Leaping 'round in my head.
And I think of all of you
As I drift off to dream;
Adoration for my friends
Making my little heart gleam.
And the last thought I have,
before I fall asleep completely--
May your future endeavors
follow your dreams, so neatly.
Happy Graduation, Class of 2014!
*Yes. Cumberbash is not his actual name. And yes. I went there. ASK ME IF I'M SORRY.
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