The Most Grown-Up Purchase

There's nothing as affirming as buying an expensive item that you would never have been able to afford as an adolescent: with the keys to the shiny new (possibly new to you) car, apartment, house, whatever, you have basically bought your way into being an adult.

Did I say affirming? I meant terrifying.

I'm sure my long-term readers (ha) will remember last summer's saga of George Clooney, my old laptop, in which George Clooney decided to burn and kill his hard drive, thereby effectively destroying everything on it (my iTunes library, all my schoolwork, all my writing, and 10,000 words of the longest thing I'd written to date) and rendering himself useless.

We managed to save George Clooney by giving him a new hard drive, which relieved me no end. But he's never quite been the same since, and lately he's been acting up a little. Not yet broken, but definitely a little suspicious.

So I decided that I would invest in a new laptop.

And when I say "decided" I mean "casually mentioned to my mother that I thought it might be a good idea."

I wasn't convinced, though, until I realized I'd be needing a laptop if I decide to pursue work in social media (hahahaha job hunting what).

Long story short, yesterday found me at the Computer Store (well, a computer store, not THE computer store) after having done a good amount of research (Consumer Reports) on what I wanted in a laptop and

I bought one.

It's sitting on my lap now. I'm typing on it.

Everybody, I'd like you to meet (in as much as you can) my new laptop, Meryl Streep. Named thusly because, like George Clooney, she is a silver fox.

Which is great and all, and this laptop is amazing and gorgeous, but ho. lee. CRAP., I can't believe that I bought a thing this expensive. Still. It's been 24h and I'm still a little bit lightheaded even looking at its screen. I almost passed out yesterday after handing over my debit card with all the money on it. I almost passed out when the sales associate handed me the box with Meryl. I almost passed out setting it up. I almost passed out walking around afterward with a bag with a computer in my hand. I almost passed out into the cardboard carton in which the Hot Dog on a Stick people served my cheese dog.

I got home and did pass out (read: napped)  for about twenty minutes before I went to work, and my words upon waking up were "well, gotta go earn some of that money back now."

I've never spent that much on anything IN MY LIFE. The closest three things were when I paid for half of my first laptop, when I paid for rent because my ex forgot, and when I paid for my annulment (which was a lot less gratifying and I think I was too much in shock and was probably crying dead from everything else in my life to realize that I'd forked over lots of money to no longer be married).

If I spend this much time almost passing out after buying a very pretty computing investment, I can only imagine what will happen when I get a car.